Great Expectations

Lizz —  May 16, 2013 — 9 Comments

I’m going to be honest, when The Miss Fits all got together and had our final prep before the meet last weekend, I was nearly in tears.  My confidence was shot, and while I love watching the other girls train well, I was frustrated that I didn’t see the progression in myself that I saw in them.

We got to the meet Saturday morning, and I don’t know why but I don’t really get nervous.  I get goofy, anxious, maybe a little loopy.  I completely blew the turn giving directions and almost caused my roommate to do a very illegal U-turn on the interstate. I am forgetful, and honestly just try to find the humor in the fact that the male onesie left very little to my innocent mind.  So by the time I was done warming up and avoiding eye contact with any male in said onsie, I felt pretty good.  I felt great actually. My squat was killer and when I got on that stage to lift, my adrenaline started flowing.

As people get to know me, they realize that I have a tendency to be a “space cadet.”  So I went up to squat and my opener felt like a breeze; my second squat (probably around 190 lbs) was just as easy, and my third squat, around 209 lbs, almost felt like a joke.  So when I walked the bar to the rack and puffed my chest out in confidence, my heart sank as I saw two red lights (meaning disqualification). I hadn’t waited for the official “rack” command. Squat was the ONE lift that I felt I’ve improved the most.  I’m not kidding, all I wanted to do was break 200 lbs, and while I did it no problem, something about the DQ threw me off for the rest of the day. I was crushed.

When I moved on to the bench, it was great. I opened with my previous PR, and while I failed at my 3rd attempt, I had to go for the heavy benches at some point.  So failing at 105 was just fine by me.

Now, the deadlift started off a little shaky, as the NASA officials fumbled to play my song request (Circle of Life from the Lion King) and I tried to high-five the official only to realize her hand was in the air indicating it was time for me to pull. Talk about awkward.  I ended up pulling 272 compared to last October’s 265, which I’m happy about—but not enough that I would go in for a post-pull congratulatory high-five from the official.

The hardest part of this meet for me wasn’t the training, the diet or the weights themselves; it was me.  I was my own worst enemy.  I was so hard on myself with the expectations I created that I couldn’t allow myself to enjoy my accomplishments.  The raw truth is that weight lifting isn’t going to allow massive PRs every meet; if that were the case I’d be squatting in the Olympics in a few years. Lifting weights is just as much mental as it is physical.  Yes, I wanted to bench 100 lbs, squat 200 lbs and deadlift 300 for a meet total of 600.  Did I do it? No. I was even jealous of my amazing Miss Fits who did, but not as much as I was PROUD of them for reaching their goals. I guess I’m just

"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive." - Elbert Hubbard

“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard

not there yet; I haven’t reached my goals, and it’s OKAY to not be at the finish line yet.

 

As women, we tend to put the weight of the world on our shoulders, and tear ourselves apart when we fail to meet our expectations.  I humbly learned this weekend that just because I’m not the strongest doesn’t mean I’m weak; it means I’m human.

Lizz

Lizz

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9 responses to Great Expectations

  1. You women amaze and inspire me. I was going to brag about my deadlift PR this morning: 295. Looks like I have a ways to go before I can get out of you’all’s shadow. Keep lifing and keep writing. You are making a difference.
    Peace,
    Pennsy

    • Lizz

      Thanks Pennsy! AWESOME job on the Dead lift PR that’s HUGE!!! getting close to the 300 mark! Each goal we reach gives us the opportunity to set new ones, and it’s such a good feeling.

  2. The last sentence of your post is what stuck out to me the most.

    “I humbly learned this weekend that just because I’m not the strongest doesn’t mean I’m weak; it means I’m human.”

    As I think through your post and all the many obstacles you faced I am incredibly encouraged! The reason that I am encouraged is becuase I learned something…If the only reason all those obstacles took place was for you to realize you are human (not weak) than every little thing that happened can be celebrated. That might at first seem odd, but this is what hit me as I read your post; I realized that as I pursue my goals I need to remember that I am human and remembering this truth gives me a deep confidence because despite whether or not I hit my goals or royally screw up, at the end of the day I can evaluate what was good and bad, understand that I am human, and move forward with several lessons learned and a stronger confidence. In the end, if I fail, (in any area of my life) my failures are a necessary part of learning to be stronger…Thanks for sharing.

    Great post – Press On!

    • Lizz

      Thank you so much for the comment, I’m so glad you and I are both learning the same lesson, it’s a tough one that’s for sure! Keep working at it, we just have to move forward!

  3. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You are amazing and you will accomplish all that you set out to do, one step at a time. Love your posts. They are very inspirational.

  4. I love your high-five moment! So funny and real. Thank you for sharing so honestly and authentically.

  5. i lifted there .i missed my over all total goal by 21 pounds ,2 missed bench attempts what i consider my best lift.so to quote my little 8 year old blue eyed blonde haired granddaughter(we’ll get em next time papaw) and so will you.you all have a great program there ,it seems one step above everybody else’s.good lifting, keep up the good work and yes i wish we could at least wear shorts over those singlets.

    • Lizz

      Kenny, thanks so much for the encouragement, we all have those discouraging moments, but thankfully we have those days where all our hard work pays off! Your granddaughter got it right, she may be a future lifter!! Good luck with all your hard work.

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