I have never envied big boobs. In high school, I was a “late bloomer” but didn’t mind since I was an athlete. In my 20s I had a friend who had to wear three sports bras to run on the treadmill. In my 30s I was nursing babies and a full cup size bigger but I’m pretty sure that’s not the same. I remember being intrigued when a friend got implants but I was certain that having surgery was not for me. Now, in my 40s, I have changed my mind. As you are reading this, I am three days post-op.
Before my surgery, and contrary to what you may think, I was proud of what I saw when I looked in the mirror. I saw an imperfect yet strong and fit body. I saw a nearly flat stomach. I saw defined arms and powerful legs. I saw a butt that is large and round and my girlfriends envy. I saw breasts that while small were capable of sustaining life. And, I saw a persistent look of stubbornness on my face that communicated that I’m not done yet. So, why have a “super elective” surgery?
For me, being strong and fit feels beautiful. Yet, no amount of training and good nutrition would undo the damage of pregnancy and four total years of breastfeeding. I have worked hard for the past two years. I have transformed my body and, more importantly, my attitude about my body. I look good. I feel good. Hell, I even have people tell me I look younger! And, that feels amazing! But, for the last year, I have been frustrated. I want my breasts to match the rest of me. While I was certainly not ashamed of my mommy “battle scars”, I decided recently that I was going to do something about it. And, fortunately, I have an incredibly supportive husband and the financial means to give myself this gift.
As my surgery approached, I was equally nervous and excited. I was nervous because I have more than my fair share of anxiety when it comes to medical procedures. I’m a pretty big wimp in that way. But I’m not going to lie. The thought of having beautiful (dare I say perky) breasts again makes me giddy with joy.
But let’s not forget, I am VERY serious about my training. I love competing in powerlifting, and understandably, I had some concerns about how the surgery would impact my training. And this brings me to the reason I wanted to blog about my experience in the first place. I am well aware that my surgery will set me back. I may even be sacrificing some long-term performance goals, especially in the bench press. I have accepted that possibility but not its certainty.
I plan to make a comeback and I have complete trust in myself and my coach. I’m hoping to take you with me on this journey as I detail the first several weeks of my post-surgery training. In my next blog, I will also share my long-term plan for getting back on the competition platform, and I hope you will follow my progress. Boobs are a touchy subject so it’s sure to be entertaining.